The Housing Gods.

I’m not sure why the housing gods hate me, but they really, REALLY do. I’m moving at the end of July… and that will be my fourth official move in a little over a year. Think about it. Pack the box, load the box, unload the box, move the box into the new house, unpack the box, store box for next move (times 50 + furniture).

Can’t wait for the packing to begin. My roommate and I have decided that packing/moving time also equal boozing time. As this is our third move together we have become somewhat expert movers… and consequently boozers. What isn’t more fun than shoving all your crap into a box for the thousandth time and drinking 8 Bloody Mary’s in an afternoon? You tell me. I’ve got nothing.

Plus, poor Charles DOES NOT handle moving well. As far as I can understand (or blindly guess) he believes I’m packing and leaving him to be a stray dog forced to fend for himself against to intensely fierce coyote population of Colorado. To say the least, it is a traumatizing time for him… and for all that suffer through his bi-polar mood swings.

Those Days.

Somedays I’m in a bad mood. I don’t want to get up, I don’t want to shower, I don’t want to go to work… I just want to lay in bed. Today was not one of those days. I woke up… the sun was shining, I walked Charlie, got ready, and everything was just peachy. Even my morning at work went by quickly and productively. But honestly, there is no way I’m permitted to have an inherently happy day. Something can and will ALWAYS screw it up. And on top of that if I commit myself to having a so called “good attitude” and being positive, the day is ruined that much quicker.

Today: My Microsoft Word program decided to perpetually shut down and delete my work… I know, I know hit the SAVE button. Well I freaking do and it still disappears. I have been battling this Microsoft demon since last September and have had 3 different tech guys “work their (clearly weak) magic”. I’ve run Apple Jack, reinstalled everything, gone back in time with “time machine”, installed new memory etc., etc… Nothing. I quit.

Now I want to crawl into bed, shut the door and pretend that I didn’t just lose several hours of work… over and over again. Looks like I may be forced into a couple glasses of that sadly, terrible wine tonight.

Just can’t take him anywhere.

Charlie got into a brawl at “Four Paws” Dog Park today. That’s what you get for leaving your mini-blue squeaky ball out for other dogs to steal. Idiot. Maybe if he’d really “catch on” to fetch we wouldn’t have these issues.

I fight with that little jerk everyday and now he has to go make a show of himself. I think he’ll be joining buddy (our three legged dog friend) in his boycott of “Four Paws”, so in other words he’s grounded.

So what? I’m a salt person with a weakness.

I’m a salt person. There are no if’s, and’s or but’s about it. I need (in the I will kill for it) french fries, potato chips, popcorn, soy sauce… ok, you get the picture. That being said there are a few “sweet somethings” that I absolutely cannot say no to… and my friends/family know exactly what to dangle in front of my weak willed face…

1. Haribo gummy bears.

2. Dark chocolate chip cookies

3. Oreos

4. Cake… almost any kind, but white

5. Cinnamon Bears

Alright, I’m guilty of hoarding the “community” gummy bears and eating them for breakfast. The joys of being a “grown-up”… allowing candy for breakfast. Now if only I could add a margarita to my morning as well?

Showers.

I have to shower. Depending on what I’m doing sometimes I’ll take two showers in one day, ALWAYS washing my hair. Really is there a point in showering if you don’t wash your hair? No.

I’m not one of those people that can go for three days and no one would be the wiser that I hadn’t showered – I wish I was but I’m not. I’m always jealous of those that can get away with it. Maybe someday when I shave my head and stop caring if the world likes the way I smell?

Probably not.