I’m a big fan of comfort. I could live in sweatpants, shorts, pajamas, running skirts amongst a few other things. So soft, flowy, amazing. Now imagine my delight when I discovered that Christmas 2009 was going to involve a tacky sweater party. Because who doesn’t love a party that is based solely on comfort and tackiness? I have been elated and probably overly excited for the past month and a half. Part of this joy came from knowing my tacky sweater was going to put many others to shame. Shame I tell you. Not only was it tacky (because tacky it was), but it also played an array of Christmas tunes. I made everyone listen… which apparently looked like I was making them smell my sweater. Not awkward at all.
I decided that if you’re going to a tacky sweater party you have to do it right. No half-assing it for me. I decided to let Christmas throw up on me for a night and call it sexy. I’ve personally never been so attracted to myself. Amidst the madness and mayhem I forgot to get a full body shot… so you’ll have to do with the top half. In addition to the upper body amazingness I also had on knee high red/green striped socks with pom poms hanging down the side and fuzzy Christmas slippers. I realize that my description may cause some to feel intense feelings of attraction, but please try to restrain yourself. Check me out:
There was also a white elephant and a plethora of wine to be had. At one point “Mr. Wee Wee” or whatever he is really called made an appearance. I surprised more than a few people and entertained comments about face peeing for the next several hours…
It was one amazing night all the way around.
MeganStecker.com 
1, I’ll give a sincere comment then (I blame my sincerity on the holidays?): a girl with a sense of humor is always attractive. So the ugly sweater ironically makes you hot.
Ok, now for my per usual stupid story …
On Christmas Eve my family goes for a walk around the neighborhood to look at lights and everyone in the neighborhood puts out luminaries (candles in bags). We live in the desert (Phoenix-ish) so we can go for a casual Christmas Eve stroll.
But it was somewhat chilly, so I decided “ooh I’ll put on my favorite hideous sweater!” (it’s like a scene all over the sweater … it’s a golf course with hot air balloons floating overhead … I’ll post a picture sometime). So my brother’s girlfriend saw me and said, “There’s a hoody in Tim’s (my brother’s) car if you want to borrow it.”
I looked behind me because of course she’s not talking to me, this sweater is AMAZING.
Then my cousin started to laugh and I realized … oh, she doesn’t get it. She doesn’t get how if something is so ugly it becomes awesome.
I politely informed her I deliberately chose to look that bad.
Merry (belated) Christmas!
I thought the ugly sweater really did something for me… I was feeling pretty freaking hot that night. Who isn’t turned on by shoulder pads and Christmas tunes?
I’m thinking your ugly sweater may be one for the books… picture please. I think it’s hilarious that she wasn’t down with the ugly sweater… good thing you “politely” informed her. I probably would have been like “What!? What?!! I’m not wearing a sweatshirt when I have the option to rock this bad boy” and then walked away. And, for the record I’m a HUGE fan of your stupid stories, make me laugh out loud every time!
Merry (quite belated) Christmas to you too!
Continuing the belated theme … Happy New Year!
Shoulder pads! Za-zing! It’s so misleading though … I mean you see a girls ample shoulders and you think ‘oooh la la’ and then it turns out they’re padded!? What a let down.
Picture coming … at some point … my sister and I made some awesome t-shirts when I was home so I’ll post pictures of those. I feel like with your humor you’d be one of a select few to see the shirts and say ‘cool’ instead of ‘what does that mean?’
And thank you!
And seriously, hottie mcHott Hott.
Happy Belated New Year to you too… I’m beginning to wonder if I should just start wishing you a “Happy Valentines Day” or “Happy Easter” just to stay ahead of the curve and avoid the word “belated” in my sentences.
What a let down… you’re looking forward to massive, square-shaped shoulders only to realize that there was padding there the whole time. Probably going to want to feel a girls shoulders up before you agree to date her. Can’t let the fake shoulders lead you on.
If I saw you in your sweater (well I still have to see it, but if it’s as good as you say it is then…) I would not only say “cool” I would run you down and demand you tell where you got it so I could go out and try to hunt down one just like it. I probably would have laughed until I wet my pants and it would have made my day. Still keeping my eyes peeled for the photo.
Hottie McHott Hott. I’ll add that one to my repertoire of nicknames. It can go right next to Megs, Meggy, Stout, Klutz, Amazon and Beast. Which of these names is not like the other? Haha!
I saw the tweet at the top of this thing about your mom and the 7 rules for getting lucky … awesome.
I like to think a girl has massive shoulders because then she can beat up bullies for me – but if she has regular shoulders? It’s back to seeing danger, kicking blindly and then running.
Ok I just looked and I couldn’t find the pictures from when I was an old school golfer for halloween (I wore that ugly sweater). SO, a picture will have to wait til next time I’m at my folks house (where the beast currently resides).
A friend’s little sister in high school called me “tall-y” … which then turned to “Tall-y McTall Tall.” So I like to label girls as hottie mcHott hott.
Well … unless the girl has delicate shoulders, in which case what a loser.
My mom did not think that one was nearly as funny as I did. “You can be Mrs. Robinson” is not a great strategy for getting lucky after 50… just saying.
Well I could understand the need for protection… people that wear tacky sweaters often suffer from other’s jealous rage. Broad shouldered girls could probably help you lessen the blow as they try to rob you of your attire. Makes perfect sense to me. AND… I’ll be patient, but am still expecting a shot of this “sweater”.
Tall-y McTall Tall and Hott-y McHott Hott are now officially in my vocabulary. Thanks for the additions, they will be widely used except on girls (cough, or guys) with delicate shoulders. Oy.
Oh and also I hope your family reads this and makes fun of you for an online stranger calling you hot.
Hi Megan’s mom.
BOO YAH!
haha
I’m sure my mom will appreciate the “hello”… and since my friends all know how attractive I look in that sweater they surely won’t make fun of me, just echo your sentiment instead. Haha…
Winning over stranger’s mothers one at a time since 1924 … Brad Stanley.