If you met me you would think I was rather normal… maybe a bit on the tall side (and by tall side I mean borderline amazon porportions), but normal. Well this would be where you are wrong. Very, very wrong. I’m a klutz with a serious deficiency in normal coordination. Walking into walls, falling on my face, tripping… are all things that I was born to do. Not sure what mother nature had in mind when she bestowed this little gift of clumsiness on me, but being the good sport I am, I make the best of it.
Note: You should know that at my house we have dog gates… they are pretty much like baby gates only with a “dog” label, allowing them to be horrendously overpriced. They are about 3.5 ft. tall and span the length of two doorways.
Ok, so here’s the story: I was on the phone chit-chatting away about a very important hike I would be going on the next day. I determined that this vital conversation would be much better if I had it on the front porch, so I attempted to hop (a word I use in replacement of awkwardly maneuver my tall klutzy body over a dog gate) over the gate so I can arrive at my aforementioned destination. During this little adventure, I end up kicking the gate and yelling in to the phone about how I hurt my toe. I’m moaning and sighing about the pain while thinking that the only way I can be feeling this much pain is if the bone is sticking through my skin while simultaneously shattering into hundreds of pieces. My eyes well up and I begin to truly admire the burning sensation that is making its way up my left leg. It burned… not just hurt, but burned. Bad.
From there I hobbled around the house for a bit thinking that I’m clearly a wimp. Who moans and groans about a stubbed toe? Who can’t walk without looking like a bumbling idiot? Me, of course. I then determined after trying on my tennis shoes that I needed new hiking boots. Have you ever tried on hiking boots (multiple pairs of hiking boots) after hurting your toe? No? Well I can attest that it is a very poor idea indeed. After stumbling about and moaning for 20 minutes in our local Sports Authority I bought a pair of B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L Columbia hiking boots. I basically fell in love.
When you buy hiking boots you have to break them in… generally you do this over a few days, maybe a week or two. I decided one night would be enough for me, and my feet would just have to deal with the consequences the next day. I threw on some socks and laced those bad boys up for a few hours of “breaking in”. When I took them off my toe was purple… and so was part of the toe next to it… and so was a large portion of the left side of my foot. I broke it. Go me.
From there I decided that breaking a toe was most likely the lamest excuse a person could have for getting out of hiking a mountain. I decided to hike the 14,400 ft. with a broken toe. Which in turn only made it worse. So now a large portion of my foot is blue. But it was totally worth it. Every single second. You would have done it too (well maybe not) for this view:
The end. Aren’t you glad you stuck around for that one? Maybe I’ll get around to posting the pics of my toe… then again maybe not.